各位晚上好，这是写作专栏的第十六期，关于专栏的介绍可见
怎样写一篇作文？
最近有同学提到了一个关于考试的问题：之前参加国内的四六级考试以及考研，写作成绩都还不错，但后来考了雅思和GRE，发现写作分数惨不忍睹，这是为什么？
造成这种情况的一个可能原因是国内外考官对于“好的写作”的评判标准不一样。国内举办的英文考试评卷者的母语一般是汉语，而雅思和GRE考官的母语是英语，两者对于英文的敏感度是不一样的。对于四六级以及考研来说，考官可能会将关注点放在语言层面，比如文章里面是不是用了很多大词难词，句式是不是很华丽，语法是不是很复杂。很多时候作文只要满足了这几点，就能得到还不错的分数（虽然文章的内容和逻辑可能不怎么样）。
但对于出国考试来说，这一招就不管用了。乱用大词难词和长难句可能可以糊弄一部分国内老师，但对于外国考官来说很难奏效，因为考官的母语是英语，他们对这门语言非常敏感。作文的用词和句式一旦有不准确的地方，他们很容易就会觉察到。而且除了语言层面的东西，他们会更加关注文章的内容和逻辑。一篇文笔优美但逻辑混乱的文章不太可能拿到高分，反之，一篇文笔一般但思想深刻的作文却有可能拿到不错的分数。两种考试的评分差异也体现出中西方对于“好的写作”的认知差异。
这对于我们的启示是：写英语作文时不确定的单词和句式千万不要乱用，堆砌辞藻绝不是一篇好作文的标准。比起语言层面上的东西，语言背后的思想才是真正值得关注的东西。这一点我们会在后面的写作中不断感受到。
今天要分析的作文题目是：
Nuclear power is the best solution to our ever-increasing energy needs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
这是原始作文版本：
习作/热心网友
When it comes to nuclear power, people will immediately get into a panic thinking of nuclear explosion because they don’t have a general knowledge of nuclear power. In fact, it has gradually become an important part of energy resources in our everyday life. Nuclear power is a great solution to our ever-increasing energy needs, but not the best as far as I’m concerned.
Nuclear power is effective, clean and environmental-friendly, so as to fix the issues of energy shortage. Many countries have nuclear power plants, although in these countries, nuclear power is still a small section of their energy structure. Admittedly, nuclear power is becoming more and more indispensable and the consequences of shortage of mineral resources can be counterbalanced by it if well developed.
But sadly, nuclear power has not become and probably will never be the best solution for lack of public trust, military specialities and technological stagnation resulting from the two aforementioned factors. For instance, the government was planning to build a nuclear power plant in LianYunGang several years ago, causing a huge commotion online and a lot of people objected the program. As a result, it was nipped in the bud.
What happened in Fukushima and Chernobyl is so frustrating and appalling that many people are worried about nuclear radiation. and that there will be a devastating disaster as well as severe consequences which the public can’t afford once nuclear leakage happens. Militarily, what is related to nuclear power is confidential as it’s closely linked to nuclear weapons, which brings more difficulties to the development of nuclear power.
Accordingly, there is still a long way for the government to go to develop nuclear power and there are numerous stumbling blocks standing in their way, both of which will prevent nuclear power from being the best solution to energy shortage.
这是点评版本：
When it comes to nuclear power, people will immediately get into a panic thinking of nuclear explosion because they
don’t
do not
have a general knowledge of
nuclear power
this source of energy
. In fact, it has gradually become an important part of energy resources in our everyday life. Nuclear power is a great solution to our ever-increasing energy needs, but not the best as far as
I’m
I am
concerned.
Nuclear power is effective, clean and environmental-friendly,
so as to
and it can help to
fix the issue
s
of energy shortage
s
. Many countries have nuclear power plants, although in these countries, nuclear power is still a small section of their energy structure. Admittedly, nuclear power is becoming more and more indispensable and the consequences of shortage
s
of
mineral resources
fossil fuels
can be counterbalanced by it if
it is
well developed.
But sadly, nuclear power has not become and probably will never be the best solution for lack of public trust,
military specialities
its secrecy in the military
and technological stagnation resulting from the two aforementioned factors. For instance, the government was planning to build a nuclear power plant in Lian YunGang
in China
several years ago, causing a huge commotion online and a lot of people objected the program. As a result, it was nipped in the bud.
What happened in Fukushima and Chernobyl is so frustrating and appalling that many people are worried about nuclear radiation
.
and that
They also worry that
there will be
a devastating disaster
devastation
as well as severe consequences
which the public
can’t
cannot
afford once
a
nuclear leakage happens. Militarily, what is related to nuclear power is confidential as
it’s
it is
closely linked to nuclear weapons, which brings more difficulties to the development of nuclear power.
Accordingly, there is still a long way for the government to
go to
develop nuclear power and there are numerous stumbling blocks standing in their way, both of which will prevent nuclear power from being the best solution to energy shortage
s
.
思路分析：
Nuclear power is the best solution to our ever-increasing energy needs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
这道题目相对比较好写，审题没有压力。这里支持或者反对题目的观点都可以。如果支持题目的观点，即认为核能是解决我们能源需求的最好方法，可以列出的理由有：
（1）比起其他新能源（比如风能和太阳能），核能对外界的依赖更少。核能发电不依赖于天气条件，这使得它能够在更多气候条件恶劣的地区应用。
（2）核电站不产生温室气体和其他有害气体，核能的大规模使用能够缓解全球变暖以及空气污染。
（3）地球的核燃料储量丰富，能够支持人类未来的长期使用。
如果反对题目的观点，即认为核能不是最好的能源解决方案，可以列出的理由有：
（1）核电站有安全隐患，切尔诺贝利和福岛核事故就是很典型的例子。
（2）核电站产生的核废料很难处理，如果处理不好可能会破坏环境以及危害人类的健康。
（3）大规模推广核能还可能会导致核扩散。如果恐怖分子掌握了核技术，全球的安全可能会受到威胁。
下面给出我写的一个版本，立场是支持题目观点：
