专栏名称: 她刊
中国女性第一刊。
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这首歌曾在深夜唱哭无数人,可唱歌的女孩子再也回不来了...

她刊  · 公众号  · 女性私密  · 2018-01-16 20:39

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本文来源 | 视觉志 (ID:iiidaily)


今天,一个很好的女孩子永远离开了。她就是小红莓(卡百利)乐队的主唱Dolores O'Riordan。


今天,下班的地铁上,回家的车里,和关上灯的房间,有多少人在静静地听着这首Dying in the sun,回忆着逝去的青春,眼眶偷偷湿了。


而那些从未听过她歌声的朋友,请你试着听一听,那是能给你巨大感动的声音。只是很遗憾,你们以这样的方式认识她。



她是那种真正能唱到人心里去的歌手。而小红莓乐队,是爱尔兰国宝级乐队,称它为史上最伟大的乐队之一也不为过。


只是在我们一代人心里,“小红莓”这三个字,还有另一个意味:“青春。”


——每个人都能在她的歌里,找到过去的自己。



年少轻狂,一腔热血的时候,我们听这首阴沉深刻的Zombie.这首反战歌,被我们唱出了反对现实、反对家长、反对体制的意味。


那时我们真年轻啊,对生活有那么多的愤怒、不满,渴望着嘶吼、呐喊,对这个操蛋的世界大声说不。


那时我们听着打口磁带盗版碟,除了大把的青春,一无所有。


Another head hangs lowly, child is slowly taken

又一颗头颅低耸,孩子渐已熬干生命的灯油

And the violence caused such silence

狂暴怎会带来如此的静谧

Who are we mistaken

而我们之中谁又是罪魁祸首?

But you see it`s not me, it`s not my family 

你也看到我本善良,我的家人也跟我一样

In your head, in your head, they are fighting

在你的头脑之中,人们却在手足相残

With their tanks, and their bombs

用他们的坦克大炮

And their bombs, and their guns

用他们的钢枪铜弹!

In your head, in your head they are cryin`

在你的头脑之中,人们在哭喊


In your head, in your head, Zombie, Zombie

在你的头脑之中,在你的头脑之中,撒旦,撒旦!

In your head, what`s in your head Zombie

在你的头脑之中,究竟有怎样的邪恶,撒旦!

Another mother`s breaking heart is taken over

又一位母亲的心已破碎,你把她的灵魂夺走


When the violence causes silence

当暴行引致死一般的沉寂

We must be mistaken

我们全都是罪魁祸首

It`s the same old theme since 

1916那是永恒的经典悲剧,自从1916

In your head, in your head they`re still fightin`

在你的头脑之中,人们从末停止争斗

With their tanks, and their bombs

用他们那些坦克炸弹

And their bombs, and their guns 

用他们那些钢枪铁炮

In your head, in your head they are dyin`

在你的头脑之中,人们在苟延残喘

In your head, in your head, Zombie, Zombie

在你的头脑之中,在你的头脑之中,撒旦,撒旦!

In your head, what`s in your head Zombie 

在你的头脑之中,究竟有怎样的邪恶,撒旦!




说一无所有好像不对,那时我们还有无数的梦想,就像这首Dreams唱的一样。


未来蒙上一片粉红色,还没有展现它原本的铁灰。我们热烈地恋爱,潇洒地生活,狂妄地以为无所不能。


那时我们敢说敢做、敢爱敢恨,活得恣意又真实。


Oh my life is changing everyday

哦,我的生活时时变幻

in every possible way

光怪陆离

And though my dreams

尽管我的梦

it's never quite as it seems

Never quite as it seems

从不像它看起来的那样

I know I felt like this before

我的感觉依旧

But now I'm feeling it even more

甚至更加强烈

Because it came from you

因为它源自于你

Then I open up and see

当我张开双眼,发现

The person fumbling here is me

那追梦人正是自己

A different way to be

陌生又熟悉

I want more

我想要的更多

Impossible to ignore

Impossible to ignore

这个梦萦绕心头,挥之不去

And they'll come true

相信它们终会成真

Impossible not to do

Impossible not to do

终会成真!

And now I tell you openly

让我向你坦白一切

You have my heart so don't hurt me

我的心永属于你,

For what I couldn't find

不要因为我的疏忽就将我辜负

Talk to me amazing mind

向我打开你的心扉,告诉我你的思绪

So understanding and so kind

你善解人意又体贴温柔

You're everything to me

你就是我的一切

Oh my life is changing everyday

哦,我的生活时时变幻

In every possible way

甚至光怪陆离

And though my dreams

尽管我的梦

it's never quite as it seems

从不像它看起来的那样

'cause you're a dream to me

只因你是我的梦中人

Dream to me

我的梦中人



可是后来,我们碰壁了,受伤了。我们慢慢认清了生活的真相,才知道有些事有些感情,就像歌词里唱的那样,I was wrong——我错了。

If you, if you could return,

don't let it burn, don't let it fade.

I'm sure I'm not being rude,

but it's just your attitude,

It's tearing me apart,

It's ruining everything.

I swore,

I swore I would be true, and honey, so did you.

So why were you holding her hand?

Is that the way we stand?

Were you lying all the time?

Was it just a game to you?

But I'm in so deep.

You know I'm such a fool for you.

You got me wrapped around your finger, ah, ha, ha.

Do you have to let it linger?

Do you have to, do you have to,

Do you have to let it linger?

Oh, I thought the world of you.

I thought nothing could go wrong,

But I was wrong. I was wrong.

If you, if you could get by, trying not to lie,

Things wouldn't be so confused and I wouldn't feel so used,

But you always really knew,

I just wanna be with you.

But I'm in so deep.

You know I'm such a fool for you.

You got me wrapped around your finger, ah, ha, ha.

Do you have to let it linger?

Do you have to, do you have to,

Do you have to let it linger?

And I'm in so deep.

You know I'm such a fool for you.

You got me wrapped around your finger, ah, ha, ha.

Do you have to let it linger?

Do you have to, do you have to,

Do you have to let it linger?

You know I'm such a fool for you.

You got me wrapped around your finger, ah, ha, ha.

Do you have to let it linger?

Do you have to, do you have to,

Do you have to let it linger?



也是到后来,尝到了人情冷暖、世态炎凉之后,才慢慢懂得,当初拼命想逃离的家有多暖,当初横冲直撞的自己有多不懂事,当初以为不理解自己的爸妈,内心有多柔软。


人啊,都是在撞到南墙,头破血流之后,才知道珍惜的。

Understand the things I say

Don turn away from me

Cause I spent half my life out there

You wouldn disagree

Dou see me, dou see

Do you like me, do you like me standing there

Dou notice, dou know

Do you see me, do you see me

Does anyone care

Unhappiness, where when i was young

And we didn give a damn

Cause we were raised

To see life as a fun and take it if we can

My mother, my mother she hold me

Did she hold me, when I was out there

My father, my father, he liked me

Oh he liked me, does anyone care

Understand what Ie become

It wasn my design

And people everywhere think

Something better than I am

But I miss you, I miss

Cause I liked it, I liked it

When I was out there

Dou know this, dou know

You did not find me, you did not find

Does anyone care

Unhappiness was when I was young

And we didn give a damn

Cause we were raised

To see life as fun and take it if we can

My mother, my mother she hold me

Did she hold me, when I was out there

My father, my father, he liked me

Oh he liked me, does anyone care

Does anyone care



慢慢的,我们消减激情,褪去梦想,从莽撞少年,变成了父亲、母亲。


我们逐渐地适应了这个社会弱肉强食的社会规则,像丛林动物一样,本能地为了孩子、为了家庭、为了生存,咬紧牙关。


多少个深夜辅导功课时气哭的妈妈,多少个失业后躲在车里不敢上楼的爸爸,就像歌词里一样:“I was utterly and totally stressed ”——我被压力重重包围。

Suddenly something has happened to me 

突然有事降临在我头上

as I was having my cup of tea 

我正喝着一杯茶

Suddenly I was feeling depressed 

突然间我感到悲观沮丧

I was utterly and totally stressed 

全身被压力团团包围

Do you know you made me cry 

你知道吗 你弄哭了我

ohh... 

Do you know you make me die , 

你知道吗 你让我想死

And the thing that gets to me 

正悄然向我靠近的东西

Is you'll never really see 

你总是视而不见

And the thing that breaks me out 

它令我怒不可遏

Is that always be in doubt 

但总是让我心存疑虑

It is a lovely thing that we have 

它是我们共同拥有的可爱玩意

It is a lovely thing that we 

多么可爱呀

It is a lovely thing, 

多么可爱的玩意

The animal,the animall instinct 

那就是动物 动物本能

ooh ohh ohh 

噢 噢 噢

 

So take my hands and come with me 

那就牵起我的手和我一道来吧

We will change reality 

我们会改变现状

So take my hands and we will pray 

那就牵起我的手和我一道祈祷吧

They won't take you away 

他们带不走你

They will never make me cry,no 

他们绝不会惹我哭泣 不会

They will never make me die 

他们也绝不会让我生不如死

And the thing that gets to me 

正悄然向我靠近的东西

Is you'll never really see 

你总是视而不见

And the thing that breaks me out 

它令我怒不可遏

Is that always be in doubt 

但总是让我心存疑虑

 

The animal 

那就是动物

The animal 

动物啊

The animal instinct to me 

那是我的动物本能

It's the animal 

那就是动物

The animal 

动物啊

The animal instinct to me 

那是我的动物本能

It's the animal 

那就是动物

It's the animal 

那就是动物

It's the animal instinct to me 

那是我的动物本能

It's the animal 

那就是动物

It's the animal 

那就是动物

It's the animal instinct to me 

那是我的动物本能

The animal 

那就是动物

The animal 

那就是动物

The animal instinct to me 

那是我的动物本能

It's the animal 

那就是动物

It's the animal 

那就是动物

It's the animal instinct to me 

那是我的动物本能



人间再苦也只能坚持。


只是亲人的突然离世啊,让一直含在眼里的眼泪,终于掉了下来。

There was a time, I was so lonely (away) 

曾经有段日子,我是如此孤独

Remember the time, It was a Friday (away) 

想起那段时光,那是在周五

You made me feel fine, We did it my way (away) 

你让我感觉好些了,以我的方式

I sat on your knees, every Friday (away) 

我坐在你的膝上,每个周五都是如此

(We walked in fields of golden hay) 

(我们踏入了那金黄的干草田)

I still recall you 

我仍旧时常想起你

(We walked in fields of golden hay) 

(我们踏入了那金黄的干草田)

I see you in the summer 

在夏天,我依稀看到你

Joe, Joe 

乔~~~~乔~~~~(祖父)

 

I sat on your chair by the fire. (away) 

我坐在你的椅子上,挨着壁炉的火

Transfixed in a stare taking me higher (away) 

目光相交的瞬间仿佛静止了,让我兴奋与幸福

Precious years to remember (away) 

记得你是多么珍贵

Childhood fears I surrender (away) 

童年的阴影,我的放弃

(We walked in fields of golden hay) 

(我们踏入了那金黄的干草田)

I still recall you 

我仍旧时常想起你

(We walked in fields of golden hay) 

(我们踏入了那金黄的干草田)

I see you in the summer 

在夏天,我依稀看到你

Joe, Joe 

乔~~~~乔~~~~(祖父)


在这首纪念祖父的Joe下面,有一个留言让人心里一疼。



你看,人生实苦。我们这些听着小红莓长大的一代人,越走越不容易。


在生活的夹缝里,我们磨圆了,变软了。


那个诗和远方的少年,终于端起了保温杯,泡起了枸杞。精神上也开始服老,学会了忍气吞声,学会了言不由衷。


就像朴树那句歌词:“你去手忙脚乱吧,你去勾心斗角吧,那面无表情的人,就是你的未来。”是啊,生活早就教会了我们无动于衷。大概每个人最真实的时候,就是喝醉时,笑得眼里都是泪......



但好在我们有小红莓、有朴树、有许巍......他们丝毫不在意我们精神上的叛变,依然挥舞着青春大旗向前冲。


我们总以为他们会永远年轻,永远热泪盈眶...我们总以为当我们被生活缴械时,依然有人替我们天真地负隅抵抗...


可是在46的某一天,Dolores就这么倒下了。也是在她离开之后,我们才知道,她在8岁的时候,曾遭受过严重的性虐待,此后长期受抑郁症的折磨...



而朴树,这个我们一直以为天真的少年,前几天,也在唱《送别》时,崩溃大哭。



这世上,哪有人活得容易呢?


你们用歌声治愈了我们,却没能治愈自己。


最后这首Never grow old,  愿你永远年轻,不再老去。


Hope you never grow old 
愿你青春永驻

Hope you never grow old 
愿你青春永驻

Hope you never grow old 
愿你青春永驻

Hope you never grow old 
愿你青春永驻

......

 — End —


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